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But I’m asking what do people think is the general mindset of a man in that situation. He can put them in the photo album like people did in past. That hurts. All of it by men. He is a loving, caring and supportive man. Now I build a new green field headquarter for my enterprise. We met on line 2 yrs ago. Is it a bad decision to be spending time with this person? However, I do notice he isn’t that way with his daughters either at all. Needless to say, aI so appreciate your contribution to the conversation. Female. I do not have a partner for more than 7 years.What do you recommend for me?Widowers can be great….however Ive experienced children holding him back, guilt leaves his hands tied. I accept he still loves his late wife and has his triggers as he calls them, her birthday, the day of her passing, tangible items. It is true that some think they are ready but not (just like after a breakup, right? I’ll cook. More importantly, it sounds like he is “pining” for what he doesn’t have – his wife and her kids. He doesn’t call me by my first name because it rhymes with his late wife. I haven’t found much on how to deal with MY feelings on dating a widower.I feel like I’m competing with his ghosts. It's okay to talk about the spouse when you're first dating someone. So if a man wanted that, I would tell him how much I care about him and want the relationship to grow AND that in order for me to feel safe and secure I need him to replace that bed and move the pic. The oldest sons wife hugged everyone except me at their kids concert ( I go with him to all his grandkids events) I cried so much from that privately. He was trying to mold me and while a 20 year old woman might be game, I’m 60 and I love who I am and know what I want.Thank you for your thoughtful message, Karen. Keep learning about him and communicating with each other. HelpHi Evelyn.

Do you throw it away? There is the question of whether he is being open with you and sharing his feelings, which is hard for most men. My marriage was 3 times as long, so I have a lot more years of stories I could tell and I don’t think it is appropriate. You may have a bad day at work and need to become a little recluse as you deal with whatever challenges are on your mind. I think your thoughtful and loving approach will help a lot of women. After a while, we miss the kisses, having someone's head resting on our shoulder, or the warm body next to us in bed.

He’s a drummer in a band and asked me to come to his show that 2nd night but I declined. Dunno. Let him cry, sleep, be silent, whatever. I am also met with the struggle of his feelings with dealing with.his divorce and the loss of a second home they shared that he LOVES, was his ” dream home, log cabin in the woods”. We communicated about what that might look like and agreed on starting out doing weekends. Hugs. It’s not as symbolic as you think. How about some general advice please? Honestly I don’t even see it most of the time. If you want more…move on, T. Bp20 months with a 63 yr old widower (lost his wife of 20 some years to cancer almost 8 yrs. When she made the arrangements, he was very clear that he wasn’t looking for a relationship, just someone to go out with from time to time, which was also my goal. He tells me he doesn’t want to lose me but won’t give in either. No. I guess you can have two?? I gave him my number so if he needed to talk about his loss, pain or anything of that matter that I would listen. Good move. Since then we have gotten closer our relationship is good always but hardly talked about his late wife. It was a choice I made to embrace the inevitable grief that I believe many try hiding from. Maybe you two can find some commone ground, maybe not. Happily he chose to invite her to either except me into the family or not, but told her I was staying. Take some time to be quiet and examine what it is you want.

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